Archive for Job

Faith, *Poetry Corner- “Despite a Circumstance”

Despite a Circumstance

Sometimes I look out my window
And I still cry
For the times that I’m alone
I still ache and sting and burn
Like touching a stove
For the love in my heart has been neglected
Seems that no ones wants to share in its beauty
And I lay my head down on my pillow and cry

And each salty tear runs down my cheek
And I just want to close my eyes
And cease to exist
But what’s the point of thinking that?
I still love being alive
Despite
Not having a boyfriend, not being married
I still love being alive
Even when my sister gives me hell
I still love being alive
When I stop feeling God so near
Somewhere, deep inside, I still know he’s here
I still like smiling
Despite the million times I’ve cried
I still like living
Despite the million times I’ve died
I still like dreaming
Despite the million times I’ve been forced
Into a harsh reality
I still love who I am
Despite what people think of me

And I know that even God in heaven
Looks at my tears
And sees the hope I have of tomorrow
The hope he has given me
Because when I am alone, staring out my window
Or head burried down in my pillow
I feel beautiful from the
Inside out
Because God lets me feel more
Beauty than I have pain
And what is a friend
Who would let me feel sorrow in vain?
He is a fountain of love
I drink from again and again
And again

——————-

Somedays I roll out of bed and feel like I could just die. I don’t know why my life is made like this. Why sometimes, I am the happiest person in the world, and other times, I just don’t know what to do with myself except rot in a corner. Sometimes I feel so elated, sometimes, I feel so down I dream of cutting myself… but I know Christ is near because when I think those thoughts, he pushes them away and refuses to let me think them. So some inspiration:

“But those who suffer he delivers in their suffering; he speaks to them in their affliction.” Job 36:15

“Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope. My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. The arrogant mock me without restraint, but I do not turn from your law.” Psalm 119:49-51

“He said to her, ‘Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.'” Mark 5:34

Somedays, I wake up thinking this has got to be the last day I can stomach, I can’t have any more hope in this pathetic life. But it is amazing how just a little light outshines all the darkness. Just by holding on one more day, and continuing this pattern day after day, I see myself getting better, being happier, feeling like a more whole person.

Sometimes, it seems like life is ripped from right underneath me and all I want to do is die in peace. But I have always had an eternal flame of light in my heart, outshining all my bitter darkness, that keeps me pressing hard into tomorrow. I know it will be okay, even if it’s not.

With Christ, I get to live above my circumstances. I can be treated harshly, yelled at, cursed at, hate everything about this world, and still feel a sense of peace in my spirit. It is the peace of Jesus himself, for he is the Prince of Peace. There is nothing like finding peace in the most difficult of places. And that is why I trust in him- because I hunger, just like everyone else- for that peace.

Let go of your worries, breathe, and trust in him.

What’s the Point of Christ?

This blog is mainly about Jesus. Clearly. Hence the name. But why? Why do I decide to put such an emphasis on him? Well, as he says in the bible:

“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

Basically, he’s saying that no one can get to heaven and be with God the Father except for by believing in him. They have to have faith in him, believing that he died on the cross to pay for all our sins once and for all, and that he rose from the grave 3 days later.

They have to acknowledge that they are sinful and can be forgiven by Jesus, if they ask for it. They need to proclaim it with their hearts and their mouths that Jesus is Lord:

“That if you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.” Romans 10:8-10

Remember it is about a change in the heart. A prayer alone cannot save you, but only if you truly believe in your heart will you be saved. But if you do this, you will be saved. You must take the leap of faith and begin to trust Jesus. Trust that he will catch you when you fall, when you make mistakes.

Some people act like there are many ways to get to God, but I only know one. Through Christ himself. We were separated from God because of our sins, because of what Adam and Eve had did in the garden, that lead to the downfall of everyone.

And because God is just and perfect and we are not because of sin, we truly deserve only to go to hell. But by God sending his only son, Jesus Christ, to the world, he gave us a chance to get to heaven.

Christ lived a perfect life, obeying all of God’s laws, and then he was crucified, carrying all our sins with him to the cross, and he died a perfect death. His rising three days later showed that he had defeated death, and thus, defeated sin in us.

This means by believing in Jesus, he forgives our sins, and our slate is whiped clean, and because Jesus gives us a clean slate, we are allowed to get into heaven. But we have to believe in our hearts that he died for us and rescued us from our sinful selves.

“Because of his love, God had already decided to make us his own children through Jesus Christ. That was what he wanted and what pleased him, and it brings praise to God because of his wonderful grace. God gave that grace to us freely, in Christ, the One he loves. In Christ we are set free by the blood of his death, and so we have forgiveness of sins. How rich is God’s grace,” Ephesians 1:5-7

He became our sacrifice to God, so we can get into heaven. And my life was jacked up before I knew him. Everything was going south, nothing made sense. I literally have never felt so much peace than when I am in Christ as opposed to being in the world. Millions of dollars could not match the peace I have found. I would choose to die for him on the spot than to have a materialistic life without him.

He healed my broken heart and satisfied me. He gave me peace in the place of ceasless worry. He was a friend, holding out a hand to help lift me up, as opposed to people in the world who conversely only ever pushed me down. He did not care about all the crap I did, he just wanted to love me, so he did. And I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for that, for a friend like him.

“You gave me life and showed me kindness,
and in your care you watched over my life.” Job 10:12

But there is only one way to get to God, through Christ alone. Any other way won’t get you into heaven. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and face the facts. Anyone could try to argue this, but I will never argue with the peace I have found and the loving relationship I have gained in the name of Christ.

That, my friends, is what this blog is all about. 🙂