Posts Tagged ‘Prince of Peace’

Faith, *Poetry Corner- “Despite a Circumstance”

Despite a Circumstance

Sometimes I look out my window
And I still cry
For the times that I’m alone
I still ache and sting and burn
Like touching a stove
For the love in my heart has been neglected
Seems that no ones wants to share in its beauty
And I lay my head down on my pillow and cry

And each salty tear runs down my cheek
And I just want to close my eyes
And cease to exist
But what’s the point of thinking that?
I still love being alive
Despite
Not having a boyfriend, not being married
I still love being alive
Even when my sister gives me hell
I still love being alive
When I stop feeling God so near
Somewhere, deep inside, I still know he’s here
I still like smiling
Despite the million times I’ve cried
I still like living
Despite the million times I’ve died
I still like dreaming
Despite the million times I’ve been forced
Into a harsh reality
I still love who I am
Despite what people think of me

And I know that even God in heaven
Looks at my tears
And sees the hope I have of tomorrow
The hope he has given me
Because when I am alone, staring out my window
Or head burried down in my pillow
I feel beautiful from the
Inside out
Because God lets me feel more
Beauty than I have pain
And what is a friend
Who would let me feel sorrow in vain?
He is a fountain of love
I drink from again and again
And again

——————-

Somedays I roll out of bed and feel like I could just die. I don’t know why my life is made like this. Why sometimes, I am the happiest person in the world, and other times, I just don’t know what to do with myself except rot in a corner. Sometimes I feel so elated, sometimes, I feel so down I dream of cutting myself… but I know Christ is near because when I think those thoughts, he pushes them away and refuses to let me think them. So some inspiration:

“But those who suffer he delivers in their suffering; he speaks to them in their affliction.” Job 36:15

“Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope. My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. The arrogant mock me without restraint, but I do not turn from your law.” Psalm 119:49-51

“He said to her, ‘Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.'” Mark 5:34

Somedays, I wake up thinking this has got to be the last day I can stomach, I can’t have any more hope in this pathetic life. But it is amazing how just a little light outshines all the darkness. Just by holding on one more day, and continuing this pattern day after day, I see myself getting better, being happier, feeling like a more whole person.

Sometimes, it seems like life is ripped from right underneath me and all I want to do is die in peace. But I have always had an eternal flame of light in my heart, outshining all my bitter darkness, that keeps me pressing hard into tomorrow. I know it will be okay, even if it’s not.

With Christ, I get to live above my circumstances. I can be treated harshly, yelled at, cursed at, hate everything about this world, and still feel a sense of peace in my spirit. It is the peace of Jesus himself, for he is the Prince of Peace. There is nothing like finding peace in the most difficult of places. And that is why I trust in him- because I hunger, just like everyone else- for that peace.

Let go of your worries, breathe, and trust in him.